Love at a distance: 10 tips for a happy long-distance relationship

One in eight American is in a long-distance relationship, and the trend is rising.

More and more couples live apart from each other, in another city or even another country. The distances range from a few hundred kilometers to several thousand kilometers.

As the distance increases, so does the longing. Every hour, every minute without your partner can be torture. Long-distance relationships are often exhausting, but they can also have advantages.

A long distance relationship doesn't have to be all longing and missing, because if you approach long distance love the right way, you can be happy in a long distance relationship too.

In this article, I've put together 10 tips for you to have a happy and balanced long distance relationship.


1. build trust

A long distance relationship is very difficult if you don't trust each other. Even in a normal relationship, trust is important, but in a long distance relationship, it probably plays an even more important role.

If you decide to be in a long distance relationship, or even if you are doing it involuntarily, it is important that you have or build a common trust base.

Your partner will not be with you all the time and will be very busy with other people. He will go out partying, make new friends, and do many things without you.

It sounds hard sometimes, but that's the way it is in a long distance relationship. You know that your partner loves you and that's why he's willing to go through the hardships of a long-distance relationship. That's why you should trust him or her.

But you should also give your partner the feeling that he can trust you. Unfortunately, jealousy is still a very common problem in a long-distance relationship. If you or your partner are very jealous, I strongly recommend that you work on it.

Check out my favorite tip here on how you can easily get closer in your long distance relationship!

2. work on the jealousy 

Being jealous is not a nice feeling. I've been through it myself and believe that jealousy is one of the biggest relationship killers.

Jealousy is mental. Many think that there is a healthy jealousy or that you only love your partner when you are jealous. In truth, however, this is not so.

Jealousy can ruin a lot of things, often gives you sleepless nights and causes many arguments.

I can highly recommend this book, which also helped me a lot with my jealousy.

My long-distance relationship tip: work on jealousy.

Maybe you have just a moment to answer a quick question...?

Sure, I'd love to ????

Otherwise, just skip the poll to tip number 3....

3. accept the situation

Complaining won't help. You probably had to move to another city because you found a job there, your partner had to go back to their home country first or you just met each other over the internet.

There are many reasons why couples have a long distance relationship and each reason has to be accepted willy-nilly.

If you fight the situation and don't want to acknowledge it, you're only making your time more difficult.

It's hard when you're not with your partner, but often you can't change it that easily. If you know that a long distance relationship is worth it because you love each other, then try to accept the situation.

Make the best of the situation and let your partner feel that too. Nothing is worse when you feel pressured by your partner.

So avoid phrases like:

Honey, when are you finally coming back


I don't think it's okay that you're moving because of your new job.

Your partner will certainly have a reason for taking the new job and certainly didn't do it to avoid being with you.

So if you decide to have a long distance relationship, make the best of it and don't drag each other down.

4. be close despite the distance

Closeness. It is probably the most important thing in a relationship.

But it is exactly what is missing in a long-distance relationship.

You can't hold each other. You can't kiss each other. You can't fall asleep next to each other.

Sounds hard, but unfortunately it's true.

Nevertheless, there are some ways to make the distance and the constant longing a little more bearable and to be a little close despite the distance.

Fortunately, there is the Internet. In the past, you could only write letters and maybe talk on the phone from time to time. Nowadays, we have the luxury of being in constant contact via the Internet.

Take advantage of the Internet. Make regular dates to Skype or communicate using smartphone apps. Show your partner that you love them. This can be a small message in between or a long declaration of love on the phone. 

Conversations are extremely important in a long-distance relationship and play an even more important role than in a normal relationship.

So that you don't run out of things to talk about and you have interesting and exciting things to talk about during every phone call, I recommend 90 Distance Dates.

5. do not overdo it

Don't overdo it with communication. Too many messages, too much phone calls can also have negative consequences.

Communication by text message has the disadvantage that it is easier to misunderstand each other than when you talk in person.

We wrote each other a lot of messages in the beginning and realized that it was probably too much. It often came to arguments, which we then tried to solve via WhatsApp.

Unfortunately, that backfired on us. If you have a reason to be angry, try to solve the problem on the phone or via Skype. This way you avoid further misunderstandings.

By the way, the language barrier is also often a reason for misunderstandings in a long-distance relationship. Again, text messages are not necessarily conducive.

If you communicate very often, it can also be that you have little to say to each other, for example, in a Skype conversation, because you have already told each other everything on WhatsApp.

Try to find a good balance. My tip: Save a few topics of conversation that you can then tell each other during a long and intense conversation or make sure that you never run out of inspiration for interesting conversations.


6 Surprise each other

My girlfriend loves surprises. But breakfast in bed, a spontaneous outing on the weekend, or an invitation to dinner aren't exactly possible when you're 10,000 kilometers away.

But even in a long-distance relationship, there are many ways to surprise each other. You can give each other small gifts that you send to each other by mail.

You can send flowers, have a love lock made or organize a sweet gift.

A handwritten love letter, a love mail, a photo album with your best memories, a care package and and and. Let your imagination run wild.

As long as it can be shipped, you can surprise your sweetheart with it.

If the shipping would take too long or the postal service in the destination country is not so reliable (e.g. in Mexico), then it is an advantage if you know a few friends of your partner from the same city.

So you can order a bouquet of roses for the anniversary, which will be placed in front of the door.

You can also try to find local suppliers. There are also websites in other countries that send flowers or small gifts.


7. clarify the financial aspects

A long distance relationship is expensive. On average, long-distance couples incur annual costs of 2,500 euros. Of course, it should not be the case that the entire financial burden falls on one partner if, for example, he or she is the one who visits the other regularly.

Sometimes it makes sense to share expenses like travel costs, etc. My girlfriend is coming to visit me over Christmas, but a flight from Mexico to Germany is not cheap. That's why I promised her that I would pay half of the flight. 


8. have a common plan

In a long distance relationship, it's very important to know where you want this to go. Make a plan together and think about what your future could look like.

Imagine that after 5 years of being in a long distance relationship, you both realize that neither of you wants to move in with your partner or leave your home. So try to plan something like this as early as possible.

One of you will have to leave home one day if you don't want to be in a long distance relationship for the rest of your lives.

Having a plan together can bond you in the long run and always gives you hope that the time of separation and longing will eventually be over.

Set a time when you want to be together like the end of college, when you are expecting a child, or the end of next year. A fixed date will motivate you not to give up.

Of course, there are couples who are in a long-distance relationship for the long haul. If you can accept this and perhaps even see a lot of advantages in a long-distance relationship that you no longer want to miss, then this variant is of course also a possibility.

Short-term plans such as a joint vacation, the joint Christmas party or a city trip on the next weekend bring a breath of fresh air into the long-distance relationship and make the separation less difficult, because then you always have something to look forward to next.


9. enjoy being alone

When you're in a long distance relationship, you're going to be alone a lot. You can't hold your partner every day, you can't eat dinner together every night, and you don't fall asleep together.

Being alone is hard and is probably one of the hardest things about being in a long distance relationship. But you can enjoy your time alone, and you should.

Find new hobbies, meet new people, do something.

The worst thing is to sit around at home and beat yourself up.

You can't change the situation now, so just make the best of it. It would be a shame to waste your precious time.

If you yourself are happy with your situation and enjoy your time alone, this will also have advantages for your relationship. Your partner will notice that you are doing well and that you are making the most of your time.

This will surely make your partner feel better as well.


10. keep the passion alive

There's no sex in the long distance relationship. While you are apart, you have no physical contact with each other.

But you can still keep the passion alive and make the anticipation of each other even more exciting with a few tools.

Send each other sexy photos, make dirty talk on the phone, or send each other little messages throughout the day to increase your desire.

Luckily, there's Skype, WhatsApp, Snapchat and Co. These programs are great for cyber sex.

Which apps are still well suited for communication in a long-distance relationship, you can find out here.

If you follow these tips, I am sure that the time of separation will be easier to endure and that you can even bring a breath of fresh air into your relationship.

Your Seduction Expert at Brideinrussia